DrDre
NBF NEWBIE
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« on: September 17, 2008, 05:31:10 PM » |
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First, it's very important that you choose the right person to seduce. This is more a matter of instinct than anything else, but most of us at will attempt to make conversation, or at least some eye contact, with a potential partner whom we consider to be about as attractive as we feel we are. So, if you are not happy with the way you look and moreover who you are on the inside, then start there!
The thrill of seduction sometimes lies in the chase rather than the conquest. The excitement of wanting and pursuing someone can give a sense of satisfaction in itself - this is especially true for men. But those who thoroughly enjoy the chase are generally people with plenty of self-confidence and their belief in themselves increases the likelihood of success.
I suggest planning and setting up the time and the right place knowing you will be alone for some period of time. If the object of your passion is somebody you see on a regular basis, the time and the place being wrong may also very well add to the thrill. If you're getting the right feedback from him (flirting), the knowledge that that he is interested but that you can't do anything about it just yet can increase the feelings of arousal and excitement. Let them linger ...
Now - just how do you know that he's interested? Your best clues come from reading his body language. His body signals are far better indicators of how he feels about you than anything he may actually say verbally. The eyes are the biggest give-away when it comes to seduction of either sex. If he returns your gaze, and especially if he holds eye contact with you longer than you'd normally expect, then chances are he?s quite interested. Trust your instincts and you'll 'feel' whether he's interested or not. Look for small gestures and tone of voice tell you a lot about what he feels towards you.
Flirt. Flirt. Flirt. Important - We flirt with others to remind our partner that we still need to be wooed by him, but when used for seduction, it's a means of keeping the other person interested and aroused, as well as letting them know that they are unlikely to be rejected. Men, who are generally the pursuers, are highly dependent on your signals to reassure them that they are 'onto something' good. And ladies, playing hard-to-get isn't particularly attractive to men unless you're sending out enough signals to assure him that you are 'gettable' and that the chase will be worth it in the end. Just beware that you may chase him away.
Once you've made it known that you are attracted to him, you'll need to let him know where the encounter is likely to be heading. People have very different ideas of what sex should be, so it's important that you both know that you're looking for the same things and headed in the same direction. The subtle approach is more likely to get you what you want. Remember, though, men generally take the lead in this area, even asking questions and trying to determine whether you'd make a satisfactory sex partner. Follow his lead. The questions probably won't be that direct (depending upon the man), but they will be based around 'self-disclosure'. He tells you some, you tell him some and this creates trust. Try discussing sex in a light-hearted, abstract manner when talking with a potential lover, testing each other in a non-committal way.
Two people, who may have been attracted to each other visually, may not have the right chemistry to move along the road of seduction. Once you?ve talked a little about it, does he still seem interested? Look for signs of acceptance or rejection (remember rejection could depend on many many things - perhaps you?re just too much woman for him). If you pick up on any signs of rejection, don't waste your time on something that is very unlikely to happen, no matter how much you think you fancy him. The right man is out there just waiting to be seduced by you!
Surrender - If you're still doing fine and the signals are good, it's time to make your move. One of you must surrender. In all probability it will be you, because even if you initiated the seduction, he will probably have taken over the role of pursuer somewhere along the line. The roles of 'hunter' and 'prey' have been decided through thousands of years of evolution, and usually fall naturally into place.
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. NBF